Putting off the inevitable

Well here I am, procrastinating...yup, thats me...just don't wanna do my homework so I thought I would blog. Not a lot going on really, same ol same ol.

The boys are doing good, they have started school, (well a month ago). R is doing really well with his new medication, he is now on Abilify and it is working wonders for his ability to sit through a class and not have a tantrum or have difficulty starting his day. S is loving Jr. High. I can't believe I have a Jr. High schooler.

I turned 34 recently, yay me :). I truly at one point in my life thought I would die at 25 so this is like bonus time really...lol. I am doing better medication wise as well, I am on three different meds to manage my schizo-affective disorder and it seems to be working well. A day here and there where there are some breakthrough symptoms, doc is working on it to get it so I don't have any breakthrough days...that would be blissful. I am still having the occasional issue, but that is getting better too. Truth be told, now that I think about it, I haven't had a bad day in about two weeks, which is off the charts for me. I know that getting help for depression or what ever is troubling you is difficult and hard to fathom but it is totally worth it to get out of the depths that have consumed you. It feels like you are trudging through super thick water when you are in the shit. It had been months since I had felt airy and light hearted enough to truly laugh at something when I was deeply depressed. It seemed like no one was doing anything right by me, like I was just being wronged in so many ways. I was "sick" quite often, mostly because I just could not deal with what was going on around me. I was very ill and my work situation was not helping in the slightest. Neither was my home life for that matter, but once I got help it all did not seem so bad. The shitty stuff is/was still happening in both major areas of my life but it is HANDLEABLE. I did not want to hide from it or get tired when I thought about it...I just deal with it now....it gets BETTER with help. .

My great friend Shel was the one who gave me strength to get help...seeing her go from where she was to where she is today was enough of a miracle to me to say that I was unusual in how unhappy I was...I sought help and got it...and I feel better now, much better...much, much, much better...lol.

Anyway...I just had to put that out there for my hypothetical reader who might be in disarray (sp?), what can I say, it was on my mind today for myself and how much I had needed to hear that from someone, anyone.

Other than that work is shitty, lol, no changes there. Although I spent today (Sunday) there working and it was really pleasant to just do my job and not worry about office politics or the boss...I really appreciated that time to just do my thing :).

Okay, have successfully put homework off long enough that I don't have to do it...tonight anyway...yay! You all take care out there, take care of each other and yourselves.

C